Circumstances and fate bring me to a Take That retrospective. I've shared my love of
Take That with you but never really done a thorough analysis of the songs. Pull up a chair and let's get stuck in.
We start with the jelly naked classic,
Do What You Like
I still love this song, it's really good fun and the video looked like it cost about 10p to make.
Song rating: 7/10
Video rating: 9/10
Jason hotness rating in comparison to the others: 9/10
Promises
Song rating: 4/10. It's not a classic let's face it.
Video rating: 5/10. There's a whiff of desperation to this video. We get it, you can breakdance.
Jason hotness rating in comparison to the others: 7/10. None of them are at their best but Howard is better in this I think.
Once You've Tasted Love
Song rating: 7/10. I've always had a soft spot for this. And Robbie raps!
Video rating: 4/10. Totally boring.
Jason hotness rating in comparison to the others: 6/10. What is going on with that hair?
It Only Takes A Minute
I consider this the first proper Take That song. It's still worth listening to 20 years later.
Song rating: 8/10
Video rating: 9/10. Plenty of cute Robbie moments. Nice dancing. Good effort.
Jason hotness rating in comparison to the others: 6/10. This video is all about Robbie.
I Found Heaven.
I am traumatised that I can't find the official video for this on YouTube. This is one of their finest moments.
Song rating: 9/10. Perfect summery pop.
Video rating: 9/10. Due to my obsessive fandom I remember this video frame by frame and it includes Robbie rollerblading and Gary trampolining!
Jason hotness rating in comparison to the others: 8/10. He looks good but they all look good (except Gary, obviously).
A Million Love Songs.
I am not linking to this. I
loathe this song. I absolutely cannot stand to hear it.
Song rating: 1/10 (for the sax)
Video rating: 1/10 (for Robbie and Jason)
Jason hotness rating in comparison to the others: can't remember as I try to forget this happened.
Could It Be Magic
Ah here we are with the song that properly obsessed me. Of course, it is Barry Manilow so it makes sense.
Song rating: 8/10. I still love it.
Video rating: 9/10. Another one I remember frame by frame. Girl in red dress couldn't dance. At all. Girl from Jim'll Fix It won a part in the video. Those were the days.
Jason hotness rating in comparison to the others: 8/10. Howard is mighty fine in this too.
Why Can't I Wake Up With You
Song rating: 5/10. Tedious.
Video rating: 6/10. Boring really. Throwing stuff into cups. Mean and moody.
Jason hotness rating in comparison to the others: 8/10.
Pray
Song rating: 8/10 but this song has not aged well. Loved it at the time.
Video rating: 9/10. This is what a boy band video is all about. Tops off. Tattoos.
Jason hotness rating in comparison to the others: 9/10. Oh yes.
Relight My Fire
Song rating: 9/10. It's a disco classic so obviously it's a great song.
Video rating: 9/10. I still love this video, so much fun. Jason in a shower.
Jason hotness rating in comparison to the others: 10/10. Jason in a shower.
Babe.
I can't discuss Babe. Can we pretend it never happened? Please?
Everything Changes.
Song rating: 7/10. I never had the love for this one. Slightly boring. Technically a good song.
Video rating: 7/10. Sepia doesn't do much for me.
Jason hotness rating in comparison to the others: 10/10. Jason in his prime.
Love Ain't Here Anymore
No it isn't. Go away. Terrible.
Sure
Song rating: 3/10. This for me is where it all started going wrong for 90s Take That. Overblown and a boring song. The split was inevitable.
Video rating: 2/10. Will it ever
end?
Jason hotness rating in comparison to the others: 7/10. Hair got too long Jase.
Back For Good
Song rating: 9/10. Oh Gary, everything is forgiven for this gem. I still love it.
Video rating: 9/10. Black and white and great moves from Howard and Jason.
Jason hotness rating in comparison to the others: 9/10. Oh yes.
Never Forget
Song rating: 10/10. You've not lived until you clapped along to this live. Robbie rejoining the boys to sing his line was a highlight of 2011 for me. What?
Video rating: 8/10. Standard childhood shots which are nice enough, but the hair boys, the hair.
Jason hotness rating in comparison to the others: 6/10. I repeat, the hair.
How Deep Is Your Love.
No. You don't cover The Bee Gees. This was the end for me. Or so I thought.
Patience
Song rating: 8/10. It's a solid song but it doesn't move me. It is very good live.
Video rating: 8/10. Gritty. They are back.
Jason hotness rating in comparison to the others: 6/10. We still have hair issues.
Shine
Song rating: 9/10. I know Marky can't sing but I love this. LOVE IT.
Video rating: 9/10. Pure showbusiness.
Jason hotness rating in comparison to the others: 6/10. We
still have hair issues.
Rule The World
Song rating: 10/10. I will never tire of this.
Video rating: 9/10. It helps by having much footage from Stardust, which is a great film. They all look hot in this.
Jason hotness rating in comparison to the others: 10/10. He's had a haircut at last. Good boy.
Greatest Day
Song rating: 9/10. Perfection. Gary on top form.
Video rating: 9/10. Sunset glory.
Jason hotness rating in comparison to the others: 10/10. It's all good.
Up All Night. No, we're not talking about this.
The Garden. Or this.
Said It All
Song rating: 10/10. This is one of my favourite Take That songs.
Video rating: 9/10. A nice video, clever and poignant.
Jason hotness rating in comparison to the others: 9/10. He's in clown paint and still looks good.
The Flood
Song rating: 7/10. It's ok but it doesn't move me.
Video rating: 8/10. A technically good video.
Jason hotness rating in comparison to the others: 9/10. Still on form.
I am stopping there as I am not a fan of the Progress album. I applaud them for taking a new direction but I like my power ballads from Take That. Or poppy pop.
Gosh, that was epic. I need a drink.
